Growing up, I was (am) extremely blessed to have a sister - one who grew up with me, Stephanie. But, I also had another sister, Christina, and we didn't see much of each other. This is our story (Christina & me) - the shorter version.
Every summer, I vividly remember the long trip from Little Rock to Tulsa to pick up my brother & sister for their summer visit. It was always tons of fun, and to this day, we still play "Sallisaw, Henryetta, Wagoner, Catoosa" on every trip - even if it's through facebook. Then came the trip at the end of the summer - I hated that trip. I think I'd cry all the way through Alma, AR, every time. Broken families suck - don't do it.
As my brother & sister grew older, their visits would be shorter, until one day they stopped. They'd grown up, there was no more visitation, and the summers stopped.
Fast forward about 10 years and the visits had been limited to an occasional holiday, but nothing really serious - no actual relationship, if I were to be totally honest. By this time, my sister had kids of her own - whom I adored, but didn't see very much of. But such was this life we lived. Looking back, I don't think I thought much about it because it seemed like the norm.
Then - what remnants of a relationship that did exist suddenly didn't. We didn't have any kind of relational foundation, really - we were bound by blood, but no substance (which, by the way, is terribly saddening to put into writing). And without any foundation, our differences on some pretty tough and real topics, separated us completely. In fact, I'd say that they tore us apart - similar to the way you'd have to "tear" something you've crocheted - ugh.
Many years went by and Matt & I found ourselves in Tulsa, trying to raise a family. Little by little, Christina & I began to build what started to slightly resemble a relationship. It was enough that I could talk about "my sister", but was still lacking. I was too wrapped up in the reasons that things fell apart to begin with. Then, one afternoon while in prayer, our sweet Heavenly Father lovingly whispered, "I never asked you to be my Holy Spirit. I only commanded you to love". Meaning, regardless of my convictions, I had no right to convict others. At the time, I felt so guilty, but I know that was not His intent. His intent was to give me freedom, to redeem love.
And let me pause "our story" to describe redeeming love. We use the phrase often, but I wanted to dig a little deeper into the meaning, to give a little better picture of what has happened in the past couple of years.
While looking up "redeemed", I came across another form of the word - "reconciled", or katallasso, which means "to change, exchange, reestablish, restore relationships, make things right, remove an enmity". Wow. If that right there does nothing for you - let's move on. Otherwise, chew on that for a few more minutes.
The word "redeemed", or padah, means "to release, preserve, rescue, deliver, liberate, cut loose, sever, to free, to ransom". Wow!!!
Back to "our story". This simple message, in the midst of my heart wrenching cry to the Father, changed the course of my life - of my kids' life. I'd love to say that this course change was immediate, but it more closely resembled a process. It was (and is) a process of changing, reestablishing, exchanging, restoring, making right, preserving, rescuing, delivering, liberating and ransoming love. It cut loose and severed the fears and heartache associated with our petty (in light of life) differences. It allowed us to build what is now a beautiful, loving relationship - and allowed my kids to have "Aunt Nina" whom they love and adore like none other.
About a month ago, my beautiful sister turned 40 and I had the distinct honor of planning her special evening. It was one of the most exciting, saddening and educating experience of my life. You see - as much excitement as I had, and as much fun as I had. . . it was quite sobering to realize that I didn't know my sister's favorite cake flavor or whether or not she liked chocolate chip cookies. But, I'm happy to tell you that I learned about these things - and continue to learn some of the most amazing things about one of the greatest blessings in my life - my big sister - every day. For His redeeming love, I am eternally grateful, and I highly recommend you giving it a try! Your life will never be the same - and that is good for OH so many reasons! :)
Here are just a couple pics from her special day! :)
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| Some pictures just don't need captions |
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| Me, mom, Steph, Nina |
